Tuesday, November 25, 2008

The sun is shining!

     Well actually it's a bit overcast here in Phoenix.  But the sun is definitely shining in our everyday lives.  It's amazing what a little sleep can do for you!  First off, thank you all for your kind words of support and love.  They meant so much to me....even if they kept the tears flowing for a bit.  I think I needed to hit rock bottom in order for things to get better.  And get better they have!  That's terrible english I know.   The past 4 nights Natalie has been sleeping a 6 hour or more stretch.  How lucky am I?  The first night it happened of course I was up every hour checking on her, but now I'm relaxing a bit.  She has fallen into a pattern that is working for all of us.  I'm sure it will change soon but for now it's all good.  I think my prayers for relief were heard, I'm so grateful for that.  I hated feeling so awful and anxious, it's no fun.  I just kept telling myself that all I've ever wanted to be was a mom and I've got to pull it together somehow!  
    I cannot complain one teeny tiny bit about Cyrena.  She has been a champ through all of this.  She is SO helpful and happy and playful.  She still doesn't love going to bed, but what almost 3 year old does?  I don't think it was going from 1 to 2 that was bringing me down, it's the whole newborn thing; sleep deprivation, trying to nurse, watching their diapers, figuring out their cries, etc., etc., etc.  I'm just not confident with newborns, but things are getting so much better. I've actually started to be able to enjoy my new baby girl and relax about things a bit.  Like I've been told from EVERYONE who knows me, I WORRY TOO MUCH!  I need to not have such high expectations for me and my children.  As long as we're healthy and happy, we're on the right track.  
Natalie is starting to get some chub.  She already has the fat rolls in her upper thighs and her face is totally filled out.  Cyrena was formula-fed and very chubby.  Since I'm nursing Natalie so far I was interested to see if she would fill out from breast-milk as much as Cyrena did with formula.  So far, it's about the same!  Their baby pictures look so similar, even down to their cowlick which is in the same spot!

p.s.  I took the girls to go check out the new Trader Joe's that opened up out here.  It's so great!  It's a lot more spacious than the other locations and they had PLENTY of the kiddie carts which is the only reason Cyrena wanted to go.  For proof of this, you can check out the wounds on the back of my ankles from Cyrena ramming her cart into me as she followed me around the store.  Also, they have all their fun Christmas goodies out, SO FUN!

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Baby Blues

I apologize for not posting much lately.  I haven't been having the easiest time and am a little overwhelmed!  I debated whether or not to write about it but I do have to acknowledge the amazing people in my life.  I've had a bad case of the 'baby blues.'  I tend to have major hormonal issues and I was a mess when Cyrena was born as well.  So the wonderful friends and family in my life have intervened and done their best to reassure and distract me and give me breaks.  They are truly amazing and I'm so grateful for their support.   I sometimes feel so isolated living here away from family.  Then I throw a pity party for myself and feel like I am not cut out to be a mother.  I know a BIG part of all these awful, awful feelings is sleep deprivation which I know will get better soon (hopefully!).  I do love my girls and love to kiss them to death, I just don't feel adequate a lot of times.   Figuring out a newborn is such an overwhelming task and at times seems impossible.  I know it will get better, it has to!  I'm looking forward to my mother-in-law's visit next week, it will be a great distraction.  And I'm looking forward to these hormones getting under control!
  On a lighter note, Cyrena finished up another session of her art class.  It was every Saturday morning and she just loves it.  It's the second time she's done it and she enjoys every minute of it.  Here are some pictures from today.

David wrote down all the things Cyrena was thankful for, then she took a turn writing down what David was thankful for.

Cyrena and her teacher, Miss Sheri.  She has taken a few classes from her and LOVES her.  

Our 4-eyed child.  These are her sunglasses that she took the lenses out of.  She loves wearing them still, but people really think she has glasses.

Our pink baby.   She looks sweet when she's sleeping huh?  You're all welcome to come over when she's screaming!

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

2 weeks down

Here are some pictures of the last couple of weeks.  Sadly, grandma and grandpa left this week! Their absence has definitely been felt, they were an awesome help to us.  But we've got a visit from grandma Barb coming up so we're excited about that.  Natalie is a being a good baby with just the usual sleep deprivation going on.  But other than that, she's a little sweetheart who is quickly making a place for herself in our family.  Cyrena hates it when she's sleeping, she wants Natalie's eyes to be open all the time.  We've only had one eye-poking incident so far, but we're sure there are more to come.  I'd write more but I'm really tired!

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Halloween Dean

That's what my brother suggested we name our new baby girl.  Instead we went with this:

Natalie Mae Dean
Born October 31, 2008 at 4:38 a.m.
6 lbs. 12 oz. 
19 1/4 inches long

This was definitely a surprise to us, we thought we had at least a week left before she'd make an appearance.  Looking back,  there were some signs.  That night before we all went to bed I asked David to give Cyrena and I blessings.  Just blessings of comfort and help for the upcoming challenges.  Cyrena has been learning about the priesthood in nursery and is fascinated that her dad can give her blessings.  So she was so happy during her blessing and it was very sweet.  Then my water broke around 12:30 a.m. and she arrived just 4 short hours later.  My lifesaver of a neighbor came to stay with Cyrena since my parents weren't in town yet.  What a whirlwind for us!  We are elated and so happy to welcome our new baby girl.  

Mom and baby a few minutes after delivery.  As soon as she was born we realized we had a clone on our hands.  She looks exactly how Cyrena did when she was born, it's amazing!

Proud new daddy

Natalie's first nurse dressed up for Halloween, giving her a bath.

Natalie swallowed a lot of amniotic fluid since she came so fast.  They had to stick a tube down her throat and empty her stomach a few times.  Then they would give her oxygen to help her get back her breath.  She decided to take charge and hold the oxygen herself.  Her nurse thought it was so funny that she called others into the room to see.  My little girl, already trying to be independent.

Our two happy princesses

Natalie is a champ. Her first night home was absolute bliss, she's a great baby!  We'll see if it lasts. :) We got home from the hospital around 5:00 p.m. on Saturday and my parents arrived around 7.  We're excited to have some down time next week with them.  

Happy 29th birthday to David!  He truly is a blessing in our lives.  I feel so lucky to share my life with such an amazing man.  I couldn't make a list long enough to say all the reasons I love him.  He is definitely my better half.   Happy birthday!

The Deans

My photo
Life as we know it is full of laughter, fun, stress, love, faith and surprises. What more could we ask for?